Timely words

"In the Christian community thankfulness is just what it is anywhere else in the Christian life. Only he who gives thanks for little things receives the big things. We prevent God from giving us the great spiritual gifts He has in store for us, because we do not give thanks for daily gifts. We think we dare not be satisfied with the small measure of spiritual knowledge, experience, and love that has been given to us, and that we must constantly be looking forward eagerly for the highest good. Then we deplore the fact that we lack the deep certainty, the strong faith, and the rich experience that God has given to others, and we consider this lament to be pious. We pray for the big things and forget to give thanks for the ordinary, small (and yet really not small) gifts. How can God entrust great things to one who will not thankfully receive from Him the little things? If we do not give thanks daily for the Christian fellowship in which we have been placed, even where there is no great experience, no discoverable riches, but much weakness, small faith and difficulty; if on the contrary, we only keep complaining to God that everything is so paltry and petty, so far from what we expected, then we hinder God from letting our fellowship grow according to the measure and riches which are there for us all in Jesus Christ."  

- Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Life Together

I read Life Together before I left for China. I think I need to read it again.

Community's one of those things I've wrestled with over the years. Before I left for China, life circumstances being what they were, I couldn't get involved in community as much as I wanted to. And I hated it. I also (wrongly) resented the church because I wasn't a part of that community.

I am so glad that God gave me the opportunity to confess that to a group of my peers and get some healing.

I found amazing community in China.  There's just something wonderful about ex-pats and the way they bind together to face that which is foreign.  I would have stayed in China for the community alone.  

But it doesn't quite work that way.

And now ... I'm back in Canada.  And rapidly trying to replicate or replace that community. And comparing myself and my relationships to others. And forgetting that it took at least a year to build up that community to the place where it was good and godly. 

And it keeps me from appreciating that which I have, because I'm so focused on that which I had and don't have anymore.

Friendships just work differently here.  It's the nature of the beast; in a city of 5 million - give or take - friends can live just about anywhere.  And then there are family and work responsibilities to throw into the mix. There are demands and responsibilities here that do not exist in China.  That is why friendships go so deep so quickly there, but very often stay comparatively superficial here. Or at least take longer to get deeper.

And when you've been away for a while, you really do have to start over with many people.  I knew that would happen.  But it doesn't mean I like it.

Truth is, no where in Scripture is good, Christian community guaranteed.  The only Person who will always be with us is Jesus.

And really, that's all we need.